In today’s fast-paced world, it feels like everything is available at our fingertips. We’ve grown accustomed to instant gratification, whether it’s getting a quote for a loan, purchasing a brand-new car, or even finding a new relationship. The modern mantra seems to be “take the waiting out of wanting.” With just a few clicks, we can make things happen. The challenge, though, is that not everything in life can or should be instant. This is especially true when it comes to emotional healing and personal growth.

The quick-fix mindset has infiltrated many areas of life, and counselling is no exception. We see the expectation that psychological issues can be resolved quickly, often with a limited number of sessions. However, the truth is, healing takes time. Real, meaningful change is often slow and requires ongoing attention and care.

As a psychodynamic counsellor, I often work with clients over extended periods of time—sometimes for years. This long-term approach allows for a depth of exploration and understanding that simply isn’t possible in a few sessions. Yes, the process can feel repetitive, and yes, it can feel slow. But like any deep wound, psychological and emotional pain cannot be rushed to heal. It takes patience.

One of my long-term clients has been with me for several years. In that time, we’ve uncovered and processed layers of pain and trauma. She eventually disclosed that she had been sexually abused by a family member when she was young. This abuse continued for several years, hidden from everyone around her. This story, while deeply painful, wasn’t something that emerged right away. It took years of building trust, creating safety, and navigating through other areas of her life before she felt ready to share this truth.

Had we been limited to a handful of sessions, she might have shared the bare bones of her story. She might have felt some temporary relief in telling someone, anyone, about what had happened. But the real work—understanding how this trauma shaped her relationships, her self-worth, and her coping mechanisms—would have been left untouched. Over time, we’ve explored how her distress has manifested in her life, through self-harm, struggles with addiction, and dangerous relationships that mirrored her early abuse.

This depth of exploration and healing isn’t something that happens overnight. It requires time—time to talk, time to reflect, time to make connections. Psychodynamic therapy offers that space. It’s not about quick fixes but about understanding the underlying emotional patterns that drive behaviour and cause distress. In this space, healing is about more than symptom relief. It’s about real transformation.

While I appreciate the benefits of offering short-term interventions like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), especially the policy of providing at least six free sessions, my concern is that for many, it may not be enough. CBT can be incredibly useful for some, particularly in addressing specific symptoms or behaviours in the short term. But therapy, especially for those with deep-seated trauma or long-standing emotional issues, cannot be reduced to a one-size-fits-all solution. For these individuals, healing takes time.

The risk with short-term approaches is that those who don’t experience immediate relief may feel that they’ve “failed” at therapy. But therapy is not a failure if it doesn’t “work” in six sessions. The relationship between the therapist and the client is at the heart of true therapeutic change. This relationship cannot be rushed or boxed into a predetermined number of sessions.

Ultimately, things take time. Healing takes time. And for those who are willing to engage in the process, the rewards are profound. Psychodynamic therapy provides the opportunity to not only share one’s pain but to understand it, to integrate it, and to transform it. It’s a slow, patient journey, but one that leads to deep, lasting change.



If you’re struggling, it’s important to remember that healing is not a race. You are not “failing” because it’s taking time. It’s okay to need more than a few sessions. It’s okay to need time to process, to talk, and to heal. Because when it comes to emotional and psychological health, things take time—and that’s okay.

Photo by Ben Marler on Unsplash